Walking into a Wall

"I love it when I go to the doctor's office and they tell me how I need to lower my stress level.... I am a single mom so there is no lowering my stress level right now." 

This has been the mind set I have had since my daughter was a baby and I went to the doctor for anxiety and depression. Here I was raising this baby who from the time she was born was awake every 2-3 hours until she was about 4 years old. As a toddler, all she wanted was Mommy to comfort her like when she was a baby and even going on 9 she does this on occasion still. 

I thought that as she would get older things aka life would get easier but it hasn't at all. If anything things became more stressful because instead of paying for diapers and formula now I was paying for dance lessons, recital fees, new dance shoes, clothes that got more expensive and the toys and gadgets that she wants. At 8 years old, I try to teach her the value of the dollar and how money doesn't grow on trees but then she sees her friends get all the things that she doesn't and feel left out which makes me feel like an epic fail of a mother. What parent doesn't want to give their child everything they desire and the memories that they will tell their grandchildren??

This is where I feel like I am walking into a wall because as much as I try to increase my income, it doesn't seem to be enough. I am a creative person at hear and a sales person by nature. I love to create and sell my products along with my other 2 sales business' but the only way I know how to expand requires the one thing I don't have.... a new, reliable car!

Before you go on to give me suggestions... my credit is in the dumps so no leasing a car, no I will not allow someone to co-sign for me and feel burdened to someone else, getting a "job" is outta the question due to not having transportation to get to said "job" and no I don't live in area that provides public transportation (you look out my window and all you see is trees and farmland). 

So there is my wall.... I feel like I cannot further my life the way it is but see no way of getting ahead. On a bright note..... I am grateful for the income that I do have, my loving, loyal customers and the business' that keep me afloat everyday. 

Everyday is a New Beginning

When I saw this quote on Pinterest yesterday, I knew that it was speaking to me because I was in a state of frustration in my life. I try to keep positivity  in my life as much as I can but I am a human and have my breaking points. As a single mom that works from home, I have my highs and lows. I absolutely love being able to get Lily off the bus everyday, attend the programs during school hours that most parents miss because they are working, taking Lily to the park when it is quiet and letting her play without fear of the older kids and so much more. At the same time, I struggle with the balance of working and family time and sometimes I don't realize that work is getting more attention then it should at that moment. The factor of business being slow doesn't help this balance. There are nights that I get so frustrated at my slow times and bills stacking up that I want to throw in the towel but there is always something that reminds me that I have a talent and gift that I get to share with others. Not everyone has the talents that I have so I am the lucky one to share them with others. 

So when the day is tough, no matter what time of day it is, just take a deep breath and remember there are many things in your life to be grateful and they outweigh the bad things. Each day is a new start and each moment is a new beginning so re-start your day with a new beginning now and smile because you are unique and amazing!